30 Day Challenge: Day 2

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Day 2 and going strong. Time for 20 facts about me…try to keep up!

1. My mother was 8 months pregnant when she found out she was having twins (surprise!). She named me after the song she heard on the drive home, lucky baby number 1 right here.

2. My childhood was living hell (or at least close to it). My father physically beat me any chance he got, and as an added bonus I got to listen to him call me names and degrade me. My mother loved to remind me how worthless I am, how I will never amount to anything, and make me feel so helpless. Both my parents are extremely controlling, to the point where it effects my daily life, they literally scare me.

3. I LOVE my job and career, but I HATE the politics! So much so that I’ve considered finding a new career.

4. I hate our current president and his clan of mindless idiots. They are ruining this country and his damn color has nothing to do with it, he’s just an idiot! I think the government should be VOLUNTEER positions!

5. I own several handguns that are practically always on me. I will exercise the right to defend myself if you feel the need to threaten me. I pray I never need it, however I will if I have to.

6. I am currently working 7 jobs (yes SEVEN) just to stay afloat! This UNaffordable health care SHIT is drowning me! I can’t make ends meet anymore and it’s killing me.

7. If I could afford to go to school to be a doctor I would! I would love to be an ER doctor or something but I will never be able to afford that.

8. I really wanted to join the military after high school but a car accident paralyzed me from the waist down for several hours and due to a traumatic head injury I can’t even qualify for the National Guard. It hurts me bad that I could never join. I hate it.

9. I love taking pictures and share my work and sell some too. I just wish I had a job that supported more travel so I could get out and capture the world.

10. I am a loser. Between the 7 jobs and basic housework I have no life. Seriously it’s work and home, nothing else. I’m a loser.

11. I don’t drink. Ever. Not even a sip, I refuse to be like my parents. Because I don’t drink I’ll never find a guy, I hate clubs and bars so I’m “weird”…you know, the loser.

12. I made a promise to my man that I would “keep an open mind” at his request. I have always wanted kids and a family but he thinks I should have that with someone my age so we can “grow old together”. He wants me to keep an open mind to any guys out there, encourages me to date and meet new people, and wants nothing nothing more than me letting him know if I’m going on a date, and he wants nothing in return. He just wants me happy. But until someone comes along he is still my man and as much as I want that family, I’m in no rush to leave the man that treats me like a God. He is SO good to me!

13. My dog is my life. He is the only one that is always there for me, loves me no matter what, and has become my best friend. If a rare occasion comes that I’m off work, I don’t want to leave home because my furry buddy can’t go. We will literally lay in bed staring at the ceiling for hours just because I can’t leave him.

14. I love to geocache! It really sucks working so much, I wish I could go more. But what I really wish…I wish someone paid me to geocache and take pictures. How great would that be!

15. I have a horrible case of ADHD! It has been known my whole life. Teachers in school use to just send me off because I couldn’t sit still, never got written up, no suspensions, not detentions either but I literally skipped class all the time and barely ever did homework (between the beatings and the ADHD, I didn’t have time).

16. I can never sleep. Ever. It takes hours to fall asleep, I randomly wake up at all hours, and I always wake up before 6:30 for some reason. I am living in a constant stages of tired.

17. I love water! I am a strong swimmer. I can spend hours swimming and not tire out. I can tread water at the lake for hours and do laps too. I love to wakeboard and basically all things water.

18. I’ve thought about killing myself more times than I care to remember, and I still think about it often. I’ve tried a couple times but that was before I knew how. I never told anyone.

19. I live with migraines almost daily. I have “functioning” migraine, which basically means I can get up and still work, though it’s not easy. I am always in pain and it’s horrible.

20. One day, I will change the world. I don’t know how, but I will.

My Life in a Nutshell

Boy has life been busy! In the past 19 days I have worked 18 of them. Apparently everyone decided to give me shifts at the exact same time, then several people called for me to pick up shifts and stupid me couldn’t say no. But that’s ok, I have two days off, picked up another 3, then two more off. I need the money SO bad right now, I just have to deal with it. Fuck you Obamacare! You fucked me over royally! I hope you get impeached! You are by far the WORST President we have ever had! And NO, your color has nothing to do with it…you’re just a fucking idiot! There, I said it. And if you tell me I’m work, I have plenty of evidence to prove you wrong. You need to educated yourself.

Anyway, back to my life. So I’m keeping busy with work. Joys. I’m really looking forward to next weekend. My man and I are going on our little camping trip to get away and talk. He said he left like he did in hopes that I would find a “nice young man” to date. He said he loves me so much he wanted to do “what was best for me” but as we know, that wasn’t exactly what was best or how to handle it best. He’s back in my life because he realized it wasn’t the best for me, but he wants me to stay open to finding someone. I am really looking forward to this trip though, time to get away from this world!

This fall I am going to Michigan for my photography. My man is taking me, he wants to encourage my photography and he loves my work, so he is taking me up there to get some pictures he wants and is encouraging me to take many more while I am there. I’m really excited about this because we have some really nice locations planned and I’m ready to take some more pictures. It has been a while, I just haven’t felt like it really. So I’m ready to get out there and get some more. In a new place too! If I haven’t shared my photography page with you and you want to see it, please e-mail me or comment with your e-mail and I will share it. I have a Facebook page and Instagram too that I share my work on, some pictures can be ordered directly from a website too if you like the work. If you just want to see it and not buy it’s cool, I just like sharing my pictures.

Finally, despite working a million days in a row I am keeping up with the Geocaching challenge, I have 13 caches for the 13 days of August so far, how many have you gotten? It’s tough keeping up with working but I’m going strong!

Where Have the Days Gone??

Life has been crazy! As usual, crazy busy! I had wonderful orientation and tons of fun, despite the problem child starting problems. I love my new job, it was so much fun! I love the people there and the bosses seem to like me. What little time I do have off has been spent caching…or sleeping. I’m really not sure how much I have slept, but I know it’s not much. I’ve been getting horrible migraines lately which are keeping me from sleeping. If you have migraines then you know that not sleeping makes the migraines worse. I haven’t done much of anything lately.

I have tried hiding some geocaches lately, which isn’t going so well. There are some trails around here that charge a fee to be used, which apparently means these fall in the “commercial geocache” rules. I have reviewed them MANY times and I have even found geocaches that required a fee to access, but somehow these weren’t “commercial geocaches” and mine is. I swear, nothing is easy. We have some rough caachers around here and some tough reviewers. So now I’ll have to wait and see what groundspeak says, but I really hope these get approved because I have a wonderful idea with them! Damn rules!!

I’m going to lay down some more. I hope all my bloggers out there are living a great life! Have fun and smile!

Geocaches Gone Wrong

A friend sent me this link recently, I just have to share! This is awesome! The link to see all the caches listed is here: http://www.geocaching.com/bookmarks/view.aspx?guid=909c9502-796e-442f-aa8f-b71be68a772b

There are so many here but I will share a few that really had me laughing.

GC185AN – Short Circuitry – This cache was destroyed because it apparently looked too much like a bomb. Yep…our paid officials keeping busy.
On 5/6/08 a user posted: Might need maitenance!!! Today there was a three hour hold up on HWY 101 at the bridge. There were rumors going around that there was a “bomb” under the bridge and sheriffs and caltrans were sent out. Pretty much all morning we heard sirens going by….I think the geocache may have been mistaken for a bomb? Couldn’t investigate as there was a huge commotion…The owner then posted: This geocache was destroyed yesterday by the local authorities and Department of Defense. Apparently, it looked too much like an explosive device. As the cache is no longer in place, I am archiving this listing immediately.

GCR9H3 – “The Sting” – This one is just epic…it is probably best not to put a cache next to a police department without permission! This cache was published, found, destroyed, and archived all in the same day! The final note posted on it said, “Oh muggles!” Couldn’t have said it better myself!

GC2F7RD – 1-800-GOT-TWEEZERS? – Ok…if you are going to hide a geocache…it’s probably best to share that with the neighbors. This one never even had the chance to be found! I’ve had my share with law enforcement while caching, most know all about it!

GC1PVBV – A Century on Century – This is just…well awesome but not! Geocaching is truly at your own risk and it is quit the risk if you end up arrested and fined 10k for it. That’s one BAD day of caching!

GC1240D – A Knight’s View – I have been here! Let’s just say a cache near a school, especially in Colorado…bad idea…

There are SO many! I could share all night! When I could use a good laugh again, I will share some more. Enjoy!

Can’t Sleep

Again. So tired. Still.

This is day 4 of sleepless nights, so much on my mind and no way to organize it and get it out. I have been off my ADHD meds for almost a week, partly because I forget to pick up my Rx and partly because I can’t afford it. Another major set back when it comes to money and health bills. Will it ever end?!

My stomach has been so sick lately. Either from the lack of quality food, or the lack of food in general. I can’t remember the last time I had a meal, like a real actual meal. I’ve been living off snacks and whatever I can round up. Mainly noodles, soup, chips and crackers left half finished in the pantry, etc. I’m still too skinny, my doctor keeps telling me that, I have been too skinny my whole life. My body metabolizes WAY too quickly, it takes 3 times the amount of meds on me as it takes to keep an average adult male under for surgery. My doctor described average adult male as someone between 180-200lbs…it takes 3 times the drug they get to keep my little 110lbs self under! I was impressed.

My doctor wants to put me on medicine to slow my metabolism, I don’t want any part of that! She told me I have to start eating more and specific foods but I can’t afford that. I’m not gaining any weight I’m suppose to be and because my body metabolizes too quickly (even when I get healthy food) it’s not absorbing the calcium, magnesium, and potassium my heart needs. Without my vitamins for that stuff I get really bad heart palpitations, winded, dizzy, and almost pass out because it puts my heart into A-fib. I think I’ve talked about this before. I hate taking the vitamins, but it looks like I’m stuck with it for now because three weeks ago when I ran out…well it was bad. I looked and felt like shit! My EKG looked just as horrible too! I was going from A-fib at a rate of 60 to a rate of 160 in few seconds, my heart rate was all over, my BP was 60/40, it was a mess! I’ve had BP of 62/44 before, doctor was afraid I would pass out, but that can be normal for me, it’s when the A-fib joins the mix that causes problems.

I refuse to relay on meds! Even vitamins!! I want off it all! But I’m stuck for now. I know I’ll never be able to get off the ADHD meds, I try to control it but that’s pretty much impossible. It also increases outbreaks of PTSD symptoms and increases the intensity, so staying on medicine to control me keeps all that away…at least a lot less problems.

I’m rambling. I’ve just been stuck at home a lot because I can’t afford to go anywhere but work. I did have some fellow cachers “kidnap” me today, they said I need to cache but I can’t afford the gas so they picked me up. I did a “power series”, many caches in a row, very close together. Even though they already had them, they drove me to each one. We also got some amazing caches with high difficulty, some awesome boxes, and just some cool caches all around! I ended up getting 205 caches in one day!! Which is pretty unheard of around here and we drove past SO many without stopping! I can’t wait to go back! We even did a “tunnel” cache, which had become quit popular in America from all the cachers I talk to. They are hidden in storm drains, you squat and crawl through, we were a soaked muddy mess but it was TOTALLY worth it!

I guess I’ll try to sleep, I just hope I can! Good night all, hope you’re having a great week so far!

Calling My Geocachers!!

My fellow cachers, I need your help dealing with a real piece of work cacher. I will fill you in through e-mail, but if you are willing to help me out please e-mail me at our24yearagegap@yahoo.com. I just need you to submit a log for me, that’s all. This isn’t something I normally do, but I will explain if you e-mail me.

Thanks! Hope everyone is having a better week than me! People are assholes!

Beyond Grumpy!

I am beyond grumpy, angry, mad, worked up, and am just fucking pissy! So much for my one and only weekend off! Naturally everyone has to come along and fucking ruin it!

There seems to be a nation wide outage on my cell carrier, can’t do anything unless I’m on a wifi connection! It started some last week, but went out all together Thursday night! If you have the same problem, then you also have AT&T! Assholes!!!! I drove 45 miles into town to trade out my phone only to get home and see the problem wasn’t fixed. Drove the 45 miles into town again to change out my SIM card to find out that didn’t fix the problem either. Used my mom’s phone, same problem. Texted some friends, they had the same problem. Got online, many people with the same problem! Called AT&T back to be told, “if this was a problem for everyone then we would have tickets on it.” I had been trying for 2 days to get the dicks to create a ticket! Of course you have none because your damn customer service won’t let us create any!!! Called two more times an FINALLY got a ticket yesterday night! Called back today to bitch some more and got told, “this is a known problem but it’s Sunday so it will not be fixed.” Direct fucking quote!! I have been trying since THURSDAY to get you assholes to fix this but you wouldn’t believe me!!! So guess what…you are getting one nasty phone call tomorrow!!!! I foresee a discount on my future bill!

The outage affect many sites, not all, but things like eBay, Craigslist, ESPN, Twitter, and MANY more. But it also shut down geocaching! Can’t access the site or use any app linked to it from my phone without a wifi connection! My ONE AND ONLY weekend off and it chooses THIS weekend to stop fucking working!!!!! I’m upset about more than just my phone though, that just definitely did NOT help the situation.

I planned this weekend off because my man had a camping tripped planned and said I can go along if I’m not working. His words were, “don’t take off of you can’t afford it but if you’re off let’s camp.” Well, naturally I couldn’t afford to take off, hell I’m still living on scraps and Ramon noodles. My clothes are WAY to big for me and it’s just a mess. So I didn’t take off, but I didn’t get scheduled so I planned on camping. On Thursday he tells me, “I don’t think you’ll like this camping trip, it’s a bunch of old people going, so why don’t you stay home and hang out with your friends.” Fine, whatever! But you didn’t have to wait till the night before you are leaving to tell me!!!

You saw from my previous I passed critical care class. Our graduation is coming up and I invited my man to come. He’s really the only person I have that I want going, besides my friends but they have to work. He agreed he’d go and said he was excited for me. Well after he ditched me for this weekend I looked at our calendar. We share a calendar so he doesn’t miss my important events and we can plan trips and stuff. I see on the calendar the night of my graduation that he has a camping trip planned. He has known about my graduation date for 3 weeks! 3 FUCKING WEEKS and he plans a camping trip during it! With his bitch daughter that he is constantly complaining about! I’m fucking livid! Not only did he blow me off this weekend, he blew off my graduation and is planning camping with everyone BUT ME! And he can’t figure out why I’m upset…I told him not to talk to me right now. He’s texted me a few times and tried calling to see if I was ok. I told him “alive” once and hung up. I really have no desire right now to talk. It just hurts that he did that and thinks me being upset is uncalled for.

I had a brief conversation with him earlier, explained AGAIN why I am upset and he still didn’t get it! Kept telling me it’s healthy to do things outside the relationship, which I completely agree, but THAT is not why I’m upset!! I gave up and said don’t text or call until you hear from me. It just really hurts right now and everything else has me worked up too. Yea, I’m over reacting, I’m such a bitch for telling him to leave me alone but this graduation was important to me and the ONLY person I wanted there and promised to be there blew me off again. So you know what, he can go camp all by himself with all these other people because I’m tried of trying to “schedule time” to see him and then him canceling it. He has plenty of time to spend with other people so I’m done wasting my time trying to see him!

Easter Break

Did everyone have a good Easter holiday? I did…sort of. I was suppose to be off work, my first holiday off in years, but that didn’t happen. Naturally someone called off, go figure. Why someone that calls off all the damn time gets scheduled so much, and on a holiday of all things…well there’s a reason she’s called Chief Bitch! I guess it wasn’t so bad, because I only had to do the first half of the shift, then got to get on with my plans.

I told my parents I was working so I wouldn’t have to deal with either of them or their families. My plans were to cache with my man, which we still got to do, just a late start. Caching Gods were not good to me! I had a very unsuccessful day while my man was finding them all! Not normal, not normal at all. I still had fun though and got to spend some time with him, which is always wonderful! I spent today caching too! We had a lot more success! My man didn’t get to join but I got to meet some new cachers and hang out with the older group. They came my way, so that made it easy and fun. I finished up the more difficult ones around my house. I wish someone would pay me to travel the world and geocache, how fucking awesome would that be??

Before my caching adventure today, I called the Chief of the department I just interviewed at to explain about the ticket I forgot about. She was totally cool and understanding and said I wasn’t the only one. : ) How awesome is that? She was really really nice about it! Said letters are mailing out today and they should be to us by the end of the week. I’m still nervous! I was informed before my interview that I should be proud to make it this far. My old instructed was shocked to find out I have an interview because he said they never hire without 3-5 years experience and I have 1 month and 1 year exactly! I guess I should be proud, but I will be even more proud if I landed myself the job. Last week, after the interview, I wrote out a nice thank you card and mailed it to the Chief too. I hope that helps. I told her I was honored to interview with her and appreciated the time. She should have gotten it today at the very latest. Now I’m just trying to keep myself busy until that thing shows up!

This week is two days of Critical Care Paramedic, including a test I am suppose to be studying for, then next week is the FINAL!!!! Holy shit!!!! FINALS = Fuck I Never Actually Learned Shit : ) After that I hope to be back in the blogging world! I miss being here, reading your stories, and posting my own. So if I vanish for a while, I’m preparing. But I promise to post as soon as I get my letter. Have a great week all!