Hello 2015, I sure hope you’re better to me…

Hello all! I know I’ve been gone for a while but I just couldn’t bring myself to write anything. 2014 sure went out with a bang and I’m still not completely over it. I will try to keep this all together, say as much as I can, and try to ensure it all makes some sense.

In the beginning of December I ran a coworker in cardiac arrest, this was an outstanding person that was the best at their job! I couldn’t believe it at all, it still feels unreal to this day, all of it. I keep thinking what if things had been different, what could we have done different, did we do everything we could? The worse feeling in the world is standing in the ER and listening to the doctor call the code, my heart just dropped. This happened fairly early into the shift and for those of you that have been following me…yes, this was at hell job. Needless to say the bitch in charge did NOT relieve myself and the other coworker that knew the patient from duty, despite being able to keep a truck in service, we got no opportunity to go home. Yes, I was stressed, I was very stressed because it was job after job after that.

Fast forward exactly one week and I was forced to resign or get fired from hell job. I was working with this new asshole that has to be in everyones business and I just wanted him to go away! Leave me the fuck alone!!!! He just didn’t stop! Things happened on a call, I blocked his hand from touching something and that was the end of that job. He said, “if you touch me we’re going to have a problem.” Fat fuck gets to threaten me and get away with it!! That’s what pisses me off the most! He wouldn’t stop yelling while I tried to explain. Then he said I hit him, then it was I shooed him, then I grabbed his hand and threw it…yes, he couldn’t keep his damn story straight and I’m out a job, no his fat ass! Not to mention, he’s easily 380lbs, maybe more, and I’m maybe 110 soaking wet…but I hit him…? Are you fucking kidding me?! I’m afraid his fat ass will squish me! I wouldn’t “hit” any part of that! Fucking asshole!

Long story short, I’m out a job, about half of my income, and thanks to this fucking Obama care that’s already killing me, I’m really struggling! No where is hiring! I’m even applying for retail jobs and factory work, literally NO ONE is hiring! I can’t pay my bills and to make matters worse my dog had major surgery to save his life. This fucking blows!

So…that’s life right now. I don’t really want to talk about much else at the moment but if you don’t hear from me for a while it’s because I haven’t been anywhere with internet. I just want you to know I’m not gone, just…stuck. I hope everyone has a wonderful start to 2015!